Considerably more than most people realize, and several of them are free. Domestic-violence agencies provide advocacy, court accompaniment, safety planning, and support groups, and you do not need to have experienced physical violence to use them. Court self-help centers publish forms and plain-language guidance. Beyond those: divorce coaches, financial specialists, forensic accountants, therapists who understand abuse, parenting-plan specialists, and peer support groups. The right combination usually costs less than doing everything through an attorney at hourly rates.
Domestic-violence agencies: not only for physical violence
This is the most widely misunderstood resource available. DV centers serve people experiencing coercive control, financial abuse, stalking, and emotional abuse, not only those who have been physically assaulted. Their services commonly include a confidential advocate, safety planning, court accompaniment, help preparing protective-order paperwork, support groups, and referrals to abuse-informed therapists and attorneys. Much of it is free.
They are also not only for women. Services are generally available regardless of gender, though the range varies by area, and men in particular often assume they will not be helped and never make the call. If you are unsure, call and ask what they provide.
Who else can help
- Court self-help centers for forms, procedure, and plain-language guides. They cannot give legal advice, but they can explain process.
- Divorce coaches for strategy, preparation, and reducing what you pay an attorney to explain.
- Financial specialists such as a CDFA to model settlement outcomes, and forensic accountants where assets may be concealed.
- Abuse-informed therapists for you, and child therapists experienced in high-conflict divorce for your children.
- Peer support groups, online and in person, which cost nothing and provide the relief of not having to explain the basics.
- Legal aid and law-school clinics where you qualify.
- Your state bar’s referral service, often including reduced-fee consultations.
Spending in the right places
A useful principle: use attorneys for legal work, and other professionals for everything else. Paying attorney rates for emotional support, organizing documents, or explaining how the process works is common and expensive. Getting those elsewhere leaves more of your budget for the parts that genuinely need a lawyer.
Building your team
Most people do not need all of these at once. Start with what is free, the DV agency and the self-help center, add a consultation, and bring in specialists when a specific problem calls for one. See our answers on finding support and affording a divorce.
Working out which professionals your situation actually needs, and in what order, is a large part of what BTGO’s coaching does early on.
Frequently asked questions
Domestic-violence agencies, court self-help centers, divorce coaches, financial specialists and forensic accountants, abuse-informed therapists, peer support groups, legal aid, and law-school clinics.
What does a domestic violence center actually do?
Confidential advocacy, safety planning, court accompaniment, help with protective-order paperwork, support groups, and referrals. Much of it is free, and it covers far more than emergency shelter.
Is a DV center only for women who have been physically abused?
No. Services generally cover coercive control, financial abuse, stalking, and emotional abuse, and are typically available regardless of gender. If unsure, call and ask what they provide.
How do I get help if I cannot afford a lawyer for everything?
Use attorneys for legal work and other professionals for the rest. Paying attorney rates for emotional support, document organization, or process explanations is common and expensive.
Where do I start if I have no money at all?
Start with what is free: your local domestic-violence agency and the court’s self-help center. Then add a paid consultation, and specialists only as specific problems require them.
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