(Note: this is part 2 of a 2-part series. To read part 1, Part 1) I found myself not-so-suddenly single – technically, “without a partner” is more accurate – in the summer of 2014. Those who have gone through something similar know about all of the stress that goes along with...
Whenever I need to forget about where I am, like during wisdom tooth extraction or stuck in traffic on I-95, I often focus on something from the past which makes me feel really good, like the best kiss I ever had. I’d become great at summoning up the inside of...
“Coercive control” is a common household term in the UK which most of us Americans have never heard of. It’s beginning to weave its way into law in the United States, where normally domestic abuse cases require evidence of physical violence. Long overdue, now various states are looking to expand...
Coronavirus did not destroy my big birthday plans. Long before this chaotic year, I knew how I wanted to celebrate my milestone, and it was even better than expected. When Tom, a good friend from college, turned 50, his friend Alicia, who works for NPR, decided to put together a...
Nobody likes being played. And most people in toxic relationships – which we refer to better as “manipulationships” have no idea that this is exactly what our partners have been doing since the very beginning: using our empathy against us, and tapping on this wonderful quality to keep us “stuck,”...
There are so many steps to take when getting out of a toxic relationship, especially when it’s gone on for nearly 20 years, and two children are involved. For me, the hardest – and first – was finally realizing that what I considered normal was actually a distorted, unhealthy reality...
Note: The video originally appeared as an online workshop followed by a Q&A session. The Q&A is not in this recording. [fvplayer id=”3″] To learn more, consider taking our interactive workshop, “The Top 7 Dangers of Toxic Relationships,” which is available now in BTGO’s Sanity School, and includes exercises, a...
How Parents Can Help Their Teen and Adult Children in Toxic Relationships One of the most frustrating and frightening experiences a parent can have is to watch their child, no matter how old, fall prey to the grips of a toxic partner. The various stages of a child’s life come...
Recently, my friend’s teenage daughter, Angie, began dating a psychopath, and everyone thought he was the greatest guy in the world. Their relationship didn’t follow the usual patterns. In the beginning, there were no red flags. Instead of pushing for something serious right away, he was very slow in asking...
In the last couple of years of my marriage, the situation with my ex-husband had gotten so extreme that I was afraid to share any of what was happening, even with my closest friends. I had been through several rounds of couples counseling, which only made me feel more hopeless,...
Part Two (Read Part One here) Figuring out the root cause for what’s keeping you awake at night is the first step toward starting to reclaim your sanity, especially as you realize the problem is surprisingly common. When we posted the question, “How did you discover your partner was a...
In the fifteenth year of my marriage, I stumbled upon a computer printout on my middle-aged husband’s desk of a girl who looked to be the age of one of the high school students I used to teach. When I called him up to question who it was, he told...
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If your children are being used as weapons — you’re not imagining it. This is your roadmap.