Most of the questions people ask early in a divorce have straightforward answers that nobody often shares, including how custody is actually decided, what legal custody means, how support and alimony are calculated, whether mediation is worth trying, what a relocation involves, and what to do when your ex hides money or ignores discovery. The answers vary by state, so treat these as orientation before a conversation with a local attorney rather than as a substitute for one. Knowing the vocabulary and how the process actually works is what stops your ex’s version from being the only one you use to make decisions.
Custody
- Will I get custody, and do moms or dads have an advantage?
- What is legal custody, and should I ask for sole?
- Can I relocate with the kids?
Money
- How does alimony work?
- How can I afford a divorce, and how do I keep costs down?
- My ex is hiding money and stonewalling discovery
Getting it resolved
- How do I negotiate when my ex agrees to nothing?
- CPS reports: what if they’re filed against me, or should I file?
None of this is legal advice, and every state differs. Use it to arrive at a consultation with better questions.
If you want help translating your situation into the process ahead, that is a lot of what BTGO’s coaching does. Take state-specific questions to a local attorney.
Frequently asked questions
What are the basics I should understand before my first attorney consultation?
How custody is decided in your state, the difference between legal and physical custody, roughly how support is calculated, what discovery involves, and what mediation would mean for your case. Arriving informed makes the hour far more useful.
Does the same process apply in every state?
No. Custody factors, property rules, support formulas, and relocation standards all vary. Use general information for orientation and confirm specifics with a local attorney.
How long does a high-conflict divorce take?
Longer than an uncontested one, often a year or more, and sometimes several. Cases extend when one party benefits from delay, which is why containing the conflict matters as much as winning any single motion.
Related: all answers · understanding the court process · what courts consider in custody
